Letting go of the need to prove your value

I recently had a realisation in the shower (many of my realisations seem to come to me in the shower!). This one was something that has been on my mind for a while, but this time I felt it in my heart rather than just in my mind. 

One of the things the negative voice in my head tells me is that I’m not good enough as I am. Imposter syndrome sometimes raises its ugly head, and the way this materialises for me is often feeling like I need to prove my value. I’ve done numerous academic and professional qualifications in an effort to prove I’m good enough. I love learning, so it supports that too, and I often enjoy the courses, but sometimes it comes predominantly from a place of feeling like I need to prove my value. 

Recently I’ve been receiving a lot of messages telling me I’m enough exactly as I am – from what I’ve been reading, from events I’ve attended, and from conversations with family and friends. Logically I know this, but now I’m feeling it too. Especially in my work as a coach. I feel it in my heart and I feel it in my bones. 

That doesn’t mean I won’t continue to learn and develop, but I know I’m enough as I am and no longer feel the need to prove anything to anyone. The right clients will find the right coach for them, and sometimes that coach will be me and we’ll be a match made in heaven like the wonderful clients I’m fortunate enough to work with at the moment. We work well together because of who we are, not because of our qualifications. 

I may still attend courses and seek qualifications, but only if they are things that I would choose to do without the validation/accreditation aspect. And in the meantime I’ll be focusing on developing skills I am passionate about developing that will support me and my clients. 

What does the negative voice in your head tell you?

Do you ever feel a need to prove your value?

You’re absolutely enough as you are. You might choose to learn more. You might choose to study more. You might choose to have different experiences. Or you might not. Either way, you’re enough exactly as you are now.